Posted on October 7, 2019 by Laura Kinker
I am finally claiming my power. Yesterday I started this layout after spending the afternoon with a good friend I hadn’t seen in a while. I wanted to do a layout that would help to squash all my doubts and fears around stepping into my creative power (mainly with regards to my writing).
I finished writing the first draft of a very experimental novel on Saturday night (over 79k words!) and that’s when all the doubts started to creep in – like am I good enough, how will people respond to this, what if it flops. I needed some space to reset and to reclaim my creative prowess so this layout was born.
I started out by writing down my BIG dream (to be a bestselling author who opens people’s mind and helps them to live their dreams) then added ALL my doubts and fears. I wrote in black gel ink since it felt very serious and somber to me. Like this was it – here are all the pieces holding me back.
It felt amazing to get all that down. Once I was done, I proceeded to paint over the words in an olive green. It’s not my favorite color but I liked how it matched the tone of the piece. I was a bit dismayed that it didn’t provide full coverage despite using acrylic paint but I told myself to trust the process and to keep moving forward.
![](https://creativegirladventures.files.wordpress.com/2019/10/aj-success-1.jpg?w=1024)
After quick drying it with my heat gun, I covered the page with a bright yellow, rolling it out with a brayer. I started to get happy without it finally started to cover up the black ink while also allowing some of the ink shapes to add texture to the paint.
![](https://creativegirladventures.files.wordpress.com/2019/10/aj-success-2.jpg?w=1024)
After another quick dry with the heat gun (love that thing!), I added a bright orange to help liven up the pages. I scrubbed it down a bit with a baby wipe wanting the yellow to shine through more but, of course, it didn’t turn out exactly as planned. That’s one of the amazing things I’m learning with art journaling: things will not go according to plan (paint is messy!) and to just go with it. Let go and just go.
![](https://creativegirladventures.files.wordpress.com/2019/10/aj-success-3.jpg?w=1024)
I let this sit a bit, grabbing a quick dinner before returning to work on it more. I love how you can still see the black ink through the paint but there’s no way you can even begin to read it. I think it adds a nice layer while also reminding me that the doubts and fears will always be there – it’s just more important to keep myself focused on the POSITIVE stuff to help keep myself going.
![](https://creativegirladventures.files.wordpress.com/2019/10/aj-success-final.jpg?w=1024)
I added the stamped text as well as the text yesterday, painting in ADVENTURE GIRL with watercolor paint. I added little stamps of white stars and the don’t be afraid to dream big stamp. Today I went back over everything with my favorite white gel pen, brightening it all up, and added the stamps along the top and sides. I still don’t feel like it’s finished but sometimes you just need to let it go and be done with it. This is another thing I need to learn with my writing because, seriously, it never feels done/good enough. (And of course I spelled successful wrong because it was late and I was tired. Oh well!)
With all the nice embellishments over the paint, I no longer notice the text underneath. It’s still there and you can see it if you really look, but all the positive affirmations are (obviously) much more prevalent. This is how I want my creative journey to be as much as possible – the good outweighing the negative. I know it won’t always be that way but more than not will be good enough for me.